Let me start by introducing myself and my kids...my name is Jennifer and I live in Miami, Florida. Both of my sons have autism. Trent is almost 11 and the little one, Toby, is 7. They could not be more different. At the present time I am a single mom and the boys and I live with my mom and dad.
The adventure of finding out you have one child with autism is a roller coaster ride that I wouldn't wish on anyone. I got so tired of people using our ignorance on us and just telling us enough to get us to take our kids to therapy (that never really worked, oh sure they could figure out how to behave with the clinician for 2 hours or whatever, but did it ever transfer into the home, not on your life...) and basically end up with more questions than answers. Granted, with Trent, he was born in 2000 and this was 2002 when we started to suspect something and 2003 when we got the diagnosis. Thank God for some great teachers and friends who helped point us in the right direction and we never would have gotten far without the wonderful people at the UM/NSU CARD Center (Center for Autism and Related Disorders).
In any case...by the time Toby was born in 2004 I was already looking for signs of it. When he was two months old we entered him into a sibling study at UM CARD to basically see a) what a younger sibling of an autistic child develops like and b) if he had any signs of it. We did everything different with Toby. I had him in Gymboree and My Gym before he could even sit up really and I put him in a day-care a couple of days a week just so he could interract with other kids. Sure enough, by 15 months, we knew and got the formal diagnosis by the time he was 2 years old.
You couldn't imagine my anger, fear and not to mention disappointment. Was this something I had done? Are my genes defective? Are their dad's genes defective? As I grew up in a faithful home, Catholic to be specific, I went to church and cried. Something occured to me while I was there. That these children weren't mine necessarily. They were, and are, God's children and He's given them to me to take care of and that He will help me...so ok...help me!!!!!
Before you go on to another blog because you think I'm some sort of holy roller, don't worry, it's not about that...but my faith is important to me and I couldn't have come this far without it...
I was raised traveling and spending A LOT of time in Disney World, the Florida Keys, Argentina and other such places. Both of my kids were on airplanes multiple times before they were a year old. So as you can imagine we've spent a lot of time in hotel rooms and people's homes, etc. I don't like staying in people's homes. My children both have completely different and distinct ways of dealing with things so having to be concerned for people's belongings for more than a few hours stresses me out like you couldn't imagine. Hotels.com is great and I have a cousin who works for Starwood Hotels and we are able to get some good deals through the Friends & Family rates. I don't only travel with my kids, I am fortunate to have great parents and when my ex has the children my boyfriend and I try to get out of "dodge" as they say and have some mini-breaks either around town or other places. Hotels have to have "accessible" rooms. What does accessible mean? Basically, that it is set up for a wheelchair. Well, in places like Disney World, Miami Beach, etc, people bring their children on vacation right? There's 1:150 kids with autism, those families are taking vacations too right? How do most of these families know, when they are spending their hard earned money on plane tickets, hotels, park tickets, etc...if they are going to have a stressful time or a peaceful time, which is what you want when you go on VACATION!!!! This is my main purpose of this blog. To be helpful to any families who may need a little help figuring their way around some of the hotels in South Florida, Orlando and even in places like DC, Las Vegas and Los Angeles. (I spend time in those places as well, and others.)
Everytime I go to a hotel, with or without the children, I am always thinking about if the room would work for them. Trent, again, the 11 year old, has what they call PDD/NOS. The neurologist labeled it "autism" so we wouldn't be beating around the bush. The thing with Trent is that he's overstimulated. He tends to want to play on his computer, laptop, DVD player, magna-doodle, Ipod or one of our Iphones. He can keep himself busy and happy for HOURS! Just don't let him get bored. A bored Trent is a difficult Trent. Toby is the TOTAL opposite. He's understiumulated which basically makes him akin to the Tasmanian Devil. Poor baby...he's CONSTANTLY needing stimulation, constantly moving, loves to swim, watch TV (but only for like 10 minutes at a time unless it's something he really likes), tear paper (just like Temple Grandin), turn the paper into little airplane looking things and thwap them. He loves airplanes, Katy Perry & U2. Feeding these kids is a whole other story and it will be another blog posting in itself. They are both part of the public school system, of which I have had some good experiences, bad experiences and wonderful experiences. Again, another blog posting...
I'm sure you're wondering at this point what I do...besides dealing with two autistic kids. I've done a number of things. My last job was working as a bookseller and events coordinator for Books & Books, a local independent bookstore here in Coral Gables. When the boys' father and I split up, it was a great place for me to be and have a place to go everyday and "get on with my life". After a while, it just wasn't the right place for me. I was getting A LOT of calls from the school having to pick up one or both of the kids in the 2009-2010 school year. My parents own an art gallery (Art Deco specifically) and have a good appraisal business. I decided to finally join the family business and I will actually be going to Chicago in a couple of weeks to take the ISA (International Society of Appraisers) Core Course so I can begin my career as a Personal Property Appraiser. :-) It gives me the flexibility I need in being able to be the best mom I can be to them and not have it affect my livelyhood/income. No one wants to live with mommy & daddy forever...
